I Did Something Selfish Today

Today I went grocery shopping. As I turned into the shopping center drive, there he was, an elderly man standing at the corner near the traffic light. His back was to me, but I could see that he held a cardboard sign and stood perched against a cane, his belongings on the ground beside him. I had seen him the last time I was there, but I brushed him off and prayed the light would turn when I approached, which it did. For the record, I am a very generous and kind-hearted person, but these days it is just so hard to know who is real, what is real. So when confronted with people who stand on the street corner and beg, I usually just look away, when what I really want to do is reach out.

The whole time I was shopping, he stayed in the back of my mind. I was reminded, as I am so many times when I see a homeless person, of my dear friend Jane and an encounter she and I had one day back in Baton Rouge. It was early morning and we had just left the television studio after doing a blurb about the cat rescue group we worked with. There was a McDonald's nearby so we decided to pop in for breakfast. As we walked to the door, we were met by a man begging for money. Jane casually, but compassionately, told him she did not have any money to give him, but if he was hungry, she would buy him breakfast. He gladly accepted her offer and walked inside McDonald's with us to place his order. The three of us sat and talked as we ate, mostly about his situation, his family and about God and faith. And Jane talked to this man like he was her friend, like he was worthy and important, and he was, no matter what his circumstance. Thinking about that day still brings tears to my eyes. Had it not been for Jane, I probably would have brushed that guy off too because of fear of getting involved. Maybe that's what wrong with the world these days. So many people are afraid of getting involved. How did we get to this point?

By the time I finished my shopping and got into my car, I had made up my mind I was going to give the man on the corner a few dollars. I didn't care how he would use the money; I was doing it to make ME feel better. After all, there is a fine line between being selfish and being selfless, isn't there? I pulled three dollars out of my wallet and approached the intersection where he stood. I intentionally let someone pull out in front of me so I would get stopped at the light and be forced to follow through with my plan. As I got nearer, I rolled down my window and held out my hand with the cash neatly folded. He hobbled over to me with a smile and then I noticed what his sign said. It said, "Can you help me find a job?" There was no dog beside him to pull at my heart strings; he wasn't sitting on the ground with his head hung low; he didn't appear to be drunk. He simply needed a job and was not too humble to stand on the street corner and plead for one. I smiled and told him I didn't have a job for him but I had a few bucks to give. He thanked me and blessed me and he said he really wished he could find a job. Then it dawned on me. I remembered the Safeway down the street had recently posted a flyer on their door that they were hiring all positions, due to a labor strike. I told the man about that and he seemed genuinely grateful. He said he would go there in the early morning and check it out. He thanked me again and I drove away.

Will he actually follow my tip and go? Does he really want to work? I have no idea. But I do know that if I go into that Safeway in the future and find him working there, that three dollars will be the best money I ever spent in an act of selfishness.